Should a husband defend his wife against insults from his family?

Should a husband defend his wife against insults from his family? posed a controversial question to our readers, which forces a man to pick a side between family and wife. The feedback indicated which side South African men value the most.

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It’s the age old dilemma after a couple ties the knot – maintaining the right level of loyalty towards spouse and family. invited thoughts from our readers on the matter and asked if a husband should defend his wife against insults from his family.

The Facebook post attracted just over 100 comments and it made for interesting reading.

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Based on the initial reaction, it seemed clear that loyalty should lie with the wife.

Vuyo George said, “Yes because they are the same person now, what applies to her also applies to him!!”

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Emmanuel Khumalo said, “We defend each other in public and in the family but when we are in the bedroom we tell each other the truth. If she is wrong I find a way to tell her in our bedroom not in the presence of the family.”

Some men felt strongly that the best approach is to side with the wife in public, but to correct her behind closed doors.

Luleka Sokudela commented, “It's a husband's responsibility to protect his wife from his family no matter what then if she was wrong then talk to her later with no family arnd. You said for better for worse remember.”

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Some of the women spoke up and declared that they are capable of defending themselves.

Marilyn McCrae said, “Mine don’t need to I'm bold enough to stand up for myself been there done it.”
Bethel Narrow went slightly against the grain and said, “I can only defend her outside the family but in our family I can't defend her if she's faulty, I must blame her for her mistake.”

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