How to be a good friend when life gets hectic and crazy
Navigating adult friendships can be tricky. Maybe you just welcomed a baby and are having sleepless nights, or you have a big project at work with a looming deadline and are thus unable to make time for your Thursday girl’s night out or join the boys at the club. However, here are some tips on how to be a good friend even when life gets a little too busy.
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Whenever our schedule fills up, one of the first things we often sacrifice is our friendships. Finding time to spend with pals can feel like an uphill struggle. But most people must realise that friendships do not need to pay the price when they get busier. This article highlights tricks to keep that friendship burning even without seeing each other daily.
How to be a good friend even when life gets busy
In her book, Friendship: The Evolution, Biology and Extraordinary Power of Life’s Fundamental Bond, Lydia Denworth reveals how the thirties are the decade where most friendships fade.
Logically, this is the age where most people are getting into the groove of things career-wise or building their families. Therefore, unlike your early twenties when you had all the free time to link up with friends, this phase will demand more effort in other things.
Nonetheless, you do not have to lose your best friend even through this season of life. In a June 2018 interview with TODAY, Samantha Barry, Glamour magazine’s editor-in-chief, shared her view on the importance of friendship, saying:
Meaningful friendships have a positive effect on your mental wellbeing. They help your self-worth and self-confidence and help you navigate life’s traumas.
Below are some practical tips to help you be a better friend and maintain a good relationship with your bestie, even when life's hassles are against you.
Communication is key
Most busy people lose good friendships because their pals assume unavailability is rejection. This is a fair assumption, considering some people use perpetual busyness as a passive way to end a relationship.
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Therefore, it is vital to be honest with your friends about your busy schedule and reassure them that you value them regardless. Always remember that communication is essential to the depth and quality of any friendship.
Schedule regular catch-ups
Maintaining a good relationship with your buddy amid life’s craziness will require more effort. Both of you need to be intentional and proactive about initiating plans.
Scheduling specific times to hang out ensures you stay connected. According to Jessica Crane, a wealth and business coach, friendships with regular catch-ups and friendly messages last longer.
Setting up a monthly coffee date, whether a 30-minute chat or a quick lunch, helps maintain those connections. Use your calendar to mark these critical days, as consistency is crucial.
Hit many birds with one stone by organising group meet-ups
If you have little time to see all your friends individually, how about inviting them on a group date? This will help you maintain multiple friendships without leaving anyone behind.
The good news is it will ultimately save you time. So, consider a game night for your upcoming meet-up rather than scheduling six happy hours.
Invite your buddy to join you in your daily activities
Do you need to get new curtains for your house? Invite one of your besties to help you run the errand. Are you going to get your nails done? Request a pal to join in. Are you going for a run at the gym?
Hit your buddy up to see if they are free to join in. Being a good friend does not necessarily mean freeing up an entire day for them; you need to connect with your buddies as you get through your day.
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Show support in times of need
Being a caring friend during times of crisis will help your buddy feel safe and loved. That text message or video call will go a long way if you cannot physically be by your pal’s side. Short messages with funny jokes or puns enhance anyone's mood.
Being there for the people you love does not require you to cancel that job interview or postpone your doctor’s appointment; the thought and intentionality counts.
FAQs
The topic of what makes a good friend puzzles many people. Here are some frequently asked questions people ask regarding friendships:
What are the qualities of a good friend?
When evaluating your circle, ensure some of these important attributes are present. A good friend should be honest, caring, dependable, nonjudgmental, and empathetic.
What are some of the ways to be a good friend?
Constantly watering a friendship will keep it alive longer. Being supportive, a good listener, respecting boundaries, saying sweet things to each other, and spending time with your pals are some ways you can live up to the friendship bar.
What are some questions to ask a friend?
To get to know your friends better, it is vital to know who they are beyond the laughs and the shared dates. Asking them about their picks, favourite colours, and favourite things to do will help you understand them better and avoid crossing boundaries.
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How can one fix a damaged friendship?
If your busy schedule gets in the way of your relationship with your buddy and you start to feel a strain, consider these steps to repair your broken relationship.
- Reflect on your shortcomings and work on them
- Always be honest, even if the truth hurts
- Choose a different way to communicate
- Admit your wrongs and hug it out
- Give it time as you work on being a better friend
- Learn to let the friendship go if you feel it is unhealthy for you
‘’How to be a good friend’’ is a common question among people who find maintaining friendships between work, family and personal obligations challenging. The good news is that you do not need to cut off your friends even when life gets busy. You must adjust your lifestyle to accommodate your friends because even a simple text can go a long way.
DISCLAIMER: This article is intended for general informational purposes only and does not address individual circumstances. It is not a substitute for professional advice or help and should not be relied on to make decisions of any kind. Any action you take upon the information presented in this article is strictly at your own risk and responsibility!
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