How Do You Know Someone Is Cheating? Spot the 7 Red Flags of an Unfaithful Partner

How Do You Know Someone Is Cheating? Spot the 7 Red Flags of an Unfaithful Partner

  • Cheating can be a traumatic experience and it's important to allow yourself time to grieve and heal
  • Some common signs of cheating include a breakdown in communication, increased interest in appearance, more time spent away from home and lying, among others
  • Counsellor and relationship expert Shelley Lewin spoke to Briefly News about how to deal with the pain of a cheating partner

Having a cheating partner can have a devastating impact on a person, both emotionally and psychologically. Cheating is a betrayal of trust and it can be incredibly painful to learn that your partner has been unfaithful.

Loving wife consoling offended husband
A loving wife consoling her offended husband during a disagreement. Image: Dima Berlin/Getty Images
Source: Getty Images

What does cheating mean?

WebMD defines cheating, also known as infidelity, as when a person in a monogamous romantic relationship has an emotional or sexual relationship with someone else without their partner’s consent.

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According to Very Well Mind, infidelity can be traumatic and is a challenging problem in a relationship. While many people are blindsided if and when they find out about a spouse or partner cheating, others may suspect infidelity because of actions that are out of the norm.

Here are seven common signs of cheating:

1. Breakdown in communication

Communication is key in a relationship. If your spouse isn't talking to you, or if they're not fighting with you (which can be a healthy way to communicate), it's a sign that something is wrong, Very Well Mind explains.

If they're not sharing their day with you or showing affection anymore, it's likely because they're no longer interested in you.

2. Increased interest in appearance

Taking care of yourself is good, but if your spouse or partner suddenly starts paying more attention to their appearance, it could be a sign of cheating, Woman's Day states. For example, if they dress better than usual or wear a different style of clothing, it could be suspicious.

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3. More time spent away from home

If time spent elsewhere continues to rise or remains elevated for long periods, this may be one of the first signs of cheating or that your partner is spending time with someone else.

According to Today.com, although you can’t possibly keep tabs on your man’s whereabouts during the workday, cheating men still find extra time to slip away from home, not just during work hours.

4. Attitude changes

According to WebMD, if your partner's attitudes and behaviour change towards you and you have no explanation, it could be because they know what's happening.

Sudden changes in spending habits can be a sign that something else is going on with your partner.

5. Lying

If your partner lies to you, it's a sign of trouble, another Very Well Mind article explains. They may lie about cheating itself, or they may lie about other things as well.

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6. Avoidance

If your partner is avoiding you, it could be a sign that they are cheating, according to Prevention.

Some cheaters avoid their spouses or partners because they don't want to answer questions about where they are or who they are with. Others avoid their partners because they feel guilty about cheating.

7. Changes in your sex life

It is normal for sexual activity in a relationship to vary over time. However, research suggests that showing too little or too much interest in sex can be a sign of infidelity in a romantic relationship.

In other words, if your partner's sexual interest suddenly changes significantly, it could be a sign that they are cheating.

It is important to note that this is just one possible explanation, and there could be other reasons for a change in sexual interest.

Relationship expert shares how to deal with the pain of a cheating partner

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Qualified counsellor, PSYCH-K master facilitator and author of Uncomplicated Love, Shelley Lewin, spoke to Briefly News about how to deal with breaking up with an unfaithful partner.

"Dealing with heartbreak after infidelity can be incredibly challenging, but individuals need to focus on healing and moving forward in a healthy way."

Tips to help you deal with the pain of finding out your partner cheated

1. Grieve

Lewin advises the affected person to allow themselves to grieve, as it is crucial to give yourself permission to feel the pain and sadness of betrayal.

"Allow yourself time to grieve the loss of trust and the relationship you thought you had."

2. Lean on your support structure

Lewin also stresses the importance of seeking support by contacting friends, family or even a therapist to talk about your feelings.

"Surrounding yourself with a support system can provide emotional comfort. A professional can guide you through the healing process and provide coping strategies.

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"Take care of yourself physically, emotionally and mentally. Engage in activities that make you feel good, whether exercising, hobbies or simply spending time with loved ones."

3. Set boundaries

Lastly, Lewin says it is important to set clear boundaries for yourself and communicate them effectively with future partners.

Learn to identify red flags and trust your instincts in relationships.

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Source: Briefly News

Authors:
Nothando Mthembu avatar

Nothando Mthembu (Senior editor) Nothando Mthembu is a senior multimedia journalist and editor. Nothando has over 5 years of work experience and has served several media houses including Caxton Local Newspapers. She has experience writing on human interest, environment, crime and social issues for community newspapers. She holds a Bachelor’s Degree and an Honours Degree in Media Studies from the University of KwaZulu-Natal, obtained in 2016 and 2017. Nothando has also passed a set of trainings by Google News Initiative. Email: nothando.mthembu@briefly.co.za