"These Are Valid": South Africans Agree With Mzansi Couple’s Relationship Rules
- A young South African couple revealed the rules that guide their relationship, sparking a conversation about boundaries and trust
- The pair outlined their non-negotiable principles, including transparency, conflict resolution, and faith, offering a glimpse into their relationship dynamics
- The TikTok video garnered mixed reactions online, with some praising the couple's clear boundaries and others questioning certain rules
- Briefly News spoke to certified relationship expert Paula Quinsee about the role of transparency in relationships, including topics like sharing phones and curfews
A young South African couple has gone viral after openly sharing the rules that govern their relationship, sparking discussion about boundaries, trust, and modern love.
Source: TikTok
The pair outlined their non-negotiable principles as they took to their TikTok account under the handle @redenate.2025. The man began by stating that his girlfriend has a curfew when going out to groove, with 11 pm being the cut-off time.
“Your phone is my phone and my phone is your phone,” said the couple, explaining that transparency is central to their bond.
The guy further revealed that he only goes out to groove if his girlfriend is also present, suggesting that nightlife is something they prefer to experience together. Another key rule is around conflict resolution, where they expressed the following:
“We forgive, learn, and move on. We don’t bring up past mistakes,” he said.
However, the love birds emphasised that repeated mistakes would mean the end of the relationship.
The couple also highlighted the importance of faith in their partnership, saying they never go to bed without praying. The video, which was shared by the TikTok user @redenate.2025 on 26 July 2025, has gained massive traction on the internet.
While taking to TikTok caption the couple simply said:
"This is what has worked for us."
Reactions online have been mixed. Some viewers praised the couple for setting clear boundaries and putting honesty at the centre of their relationship, while others, however, felt some of the rules, such as curfews and phone sharing, were a bit off.
Regardless of opinions, the couple’s candidness has caught the attention of many, offering a glimpse into how some South Africans are managing love in today’s world.
How to navigate transparency in relationships
While speaking with certified relationship expert Paula Quinsee, the expert told Briefly News that transparency "builds trust when it comes from choice, not obligation or ultimatums."
She added that:
"Voluntarily sharing information, such as letting your partner know where you are or what your plans are, builds connection and eases concern and worry. But when conditions are enforced, such as mandatory phone access or curfews, this often signals underlying issues such as control and insecurity rather than trust. Healthy transparency should be one of mutual respect, with the goal being openness, not policing your partner."
SA reacts to the couple's relationship rules
People in South Africa flooded the comment section, sharing their thoughts on the couple's set of relationship rules, saying:
Mashenge said:
"These are valid if you actually want a long-term relationship."
Sho Jitaa expressed:
"Eh, your phone is my phone??? My phone is your phone??? Niyayazi in ICU."
Nkosingiphiwe replied:
"These rules are reasonable. I don't know what y'all are all complaining about."
Baby G shared:
"11 pm is when I leave the house to go to the groove, come back at 7 am."
B commented:
"Mind you, 11 pm is when the vibes start transcending."
Don.Blanc0 simply said:
"I don't see anything wrong with the curfew, the comments ba off... Hope y'all grow strong."
Watch the video below:
Source: TikTok
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Source: Briefly News
Johana Mukandila (Human Interest Editor) Johana Tshidibi Mukandila has been a Human Interest Reporter at Briefly News since 2023. She has over four years of experience as a multimedia journalist. Johana holds a national diploma in journalism from the Cape Peninsula University Of Technology (2023). She has worked at the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, PAICTA, BONA Magazine and Albella Music Production. She is currently furthering her education in journalism at the CPUT. She has passed a set of trainings from Google News Initiative. Reach her at johana.mukandila@briefly.co.za
Paula Quinsee (Certified Relationship Therapy Educator and founder of Engaged Humans) Paula Quinsee is the founder of Engaged Humans, facilitating connection between individuals and organisations to create a more human-connected world. She is a certified Imago Relationship Therapy educator and facilitator, NLP practitioner, PDA analyst, coach and trainer. Paula is also the author of two self-help guides - Embracing Conflict and Embracing No - as well as an international speaker, advocate for mental health and activist for gender-based violence.
