South African Men Share Their Strict Boyfriend Rules, Mzansi is Amused

South African Men Share Their Strict Boyfriend Rules, Mzansi is Amused

  • A gentleman took to social media to ask men about their strict rules as boyfriends
  • The video sparked reactions from men online as they rushed to the comments section to express their thoughts
  • The gents' responses amused the online community, and the clip received many views, likes and comments
  • Briefly News spoke to psychologist and relationship expert Penny Holburn, who gave insight into whether strict rules are healthy in a relationship

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One young South African man caused a huge stir online with his question that, sent Mzansi into a frenzy.

Men shared their rules as strict boyfriends on TikTok.
South African men revealed their rules as strict boyfriends on TikTok. Image: @theycallmemasterbruce/Instagram and Morsa Images/ Getty Images
Source: UGC

Strict boyfriends share their rules

With everything in life, there are rules and regulations that one should abide by in order to live well and peacefully. These gentlemen have set boundaries for their partners. They took to the comments section to respond to TikTok user @theycallmemasterbruce, who asked men about rules within their relationships.

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The guy asked men what their rules are as strict boyfriends, and the men flooded his comments section voicing their opinions, with one saying:

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"Any guy who hugs you while we are out together must also hug me."

Another one added:

"If you post it on Instagram before I see it, don’t send it afterwards, and if you sent it to me first, there's no need to post it afterwards."

The gents went wild in the comments section, and many online users loved the man's clip, which gathered over 209K, along with thousands of likes and comments on TikTok.

Watch the video below:

Are strict rules healthy in a relationship

While speaking to Briefly News, psychologist and relationship expert Penny Holburn said there may be unwritten rules in romantic partnerships in addition to written or spoken ones. The relationship expert expressed that the rules could be:

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"Being faithful, being honest, how finances are spent, etc. If the rules are agreed to and acceptable to both parties, it can be quite a good thing to have rules in a relationship," she shared.

She went on to say that setting rules in a partnership is not the same as wanting to be in charge.

"In general, in South Africa, there is a view that men and women are equal and in romantic relationships, it is a partnership. That means the views and opinions of each person count equally. No one dominates the other one."

The drive to control someone else or a partner can stem from various factors, including a fear of losing control and the need to dominate oneself, experience gained from the behaviour of one's family, or habit. "Generally speaking, insecure people feel the need to control others," she said.

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Why do men establish strict rules in their relationships, as exemplified by the responses in the TikTok video?

"It could be a need to feel in charge. It could be a need to feel superior. It could be a cultural or social norm in the environments they grew up in. Perhaps the man was taken advantage of in a previous relationship and never wants that to happen again, and so is an over-reaction to a bad experience," she said.

How do you perceive the cultural or societal influences shaping these rules set by men in their relationships, particularly in the context of South Africa?

"Whether we like it or not, we are influenced strongly by our cultural and social environments."

Penny explained that our upbringing shapes who we are, and this effect tends to stick with us even when we move into new and possibly different circumstances. Most of us don't push ourselves too hard regarding our behaviour until a noteworthy event occurs to alter it, we carry on as we always have.

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What is the potential impact of these rules on the dynamics of trust and communication within romantic relationships?

"Rules that are set together and followed together will help a relationship solidify. Communication and trust can be high in such relationships. If rules are imposed on someone without agreement, then trust will be lost over time. If one partner is very dominant and controlling, then it is likely the other partner will come to feel resentful and angry, and it will be more like a parent/child or owner/servant relationship."

Online users were amused

Men and women joined in on the fun, flocking to the comments to share their strict rules for their relationships.

Sisa said:

"He's not on TikTok, but I can speak for him. He says no groove unless I'm with him, no male besties."

Moe shared:

"Not too much of a rule, but it goes for both of us. We do not call each other by our government names. It's Babe, baby, king, queen."

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Marion k added:

"He says never to reply to any compliments and replying to anyone on media in a disrespectful way even if they did first, never post savage WhatsApp statuses. He makes me delete them."

Nonjabulo Nkosi said:

"Bathong... he said 'strict' boyfriend, not 'controlling' or 'possessive' boyfriend, but 'strict'. Focus, gents."

Woman's "strict" boyfriend cuts her nails for being too long in a video

Briefly News previously reported that a woman showed people how her boyfriend treated her after not liking her nails The lady made a video of her boyfriend's savage move.

The clip of the woman and her boyfriend received thousands of likes There were comments from hundreds of women who said they were hoping she was joking.

Source: Briefly News

Johana Mukandila avatar

Johana Mukandila (Editor) Johana Tshidibi Mukandila has been a Human Interest Reporter at Briefly News since 2023. She holds a national diploma in journalism from the Cape Peninsula University Of Technology (2023). She has worked at the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, PAICTA, BONA Magazine and Albella Music Production. She is currently furthering her education in journalism at the CPUT. She has passed a set of trainings from Google News Initiative. Reach her at

Penny Holburn avatar

Penny Holburn (Founder of Penny Holburn Coaching) Penny Holburn is a life, career and business coach running her own coaching business since 2010. She has spent 20 years as a consultant in psychological assessment, organisational development, personal and business change, leadership development, coaching and counselling. Penny has majors in psychology and industrial psychology and an MSc Cum Laude in psychology and has completed a Senior Management Development Programme through Wits Business School.

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