"Dignified Does Not Equal Expensive": Expert Opens Chat About How Much Funerals Should Cost

• A funeral expert sparked conversation by questioning how much families should really spend during a time of loss
• Her insights highlighted the tension between cultural expectations, grief and the long-term financial impact funerals can leave behind
• The discussion pushed many to reflect on whether honouring the dead should ever come at the cost of the living

A simple question about funeral costs opened a deeply emotional conversation in Mzansi, forcing families to reflect on whether honouring the dead should ever come at the expense of the living left behind.

A discussion around funeral spending gained attention after @umkhokheli posted a video on 18 December 2025, opening up about how much families should realistically spend when burying a loved one. In the video, the funeral business owner based in KwaZulu-Natal shared her professional experience working closely with grieving families and the financial pressure that often follows a death. She explained that when she started her funeral business, her goal was to keep services affordable so families would not fall into unnecessary debt during an already painful time. However, she revealed that this approach was not always welcomed, as some families felt offended when advised not to overspend on funerals for their loved ones.

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Drawing from years in the industry, user Umkhokheli said she later tried to understand where families were coming from, even though she personally does not promote expensive funerals. She explained that for many people, the funeral feels like the final act of love they can offer, a moment where dignity, respect and honour take centre stage. In her reflection, she posed a direct question to viewers, asking whether R100,000 is enough for a funeral, while making it clear that she does not encourage costly send-offs but fully understands why some families choose them. The video quickly resonated because it touched on a deeply emotional and cultural issue in South Africa.

When grief meets expectations

Funerals often carry social expectations, family pressure and community visibility, which makes the conversation difficult but necessary. Many viewers related to the tension between wanting to honour a loved one properly and protecting the family left behind from long-term financial strain. The discussion felt real because it reflected situations many South Africans have either experienced or witnessed in their own communities.

In the comments, Mzansi largely agreed with Umkhokheli’s perspective, with many saying expensive funerals should be discouraged in favour of supporting the living. People suggested investing money in children’s education or long-term stability instead of once-off ceremonies. Others echoed her sentiment that grief looks different for everyone and that respect should remain central. As she said in the video, we all have different ways of mourning, and the pain of losing a loved one is not easy, a reminder that there is no single right way to say goodbye.

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Here’s what Mzansi had to say

FaithM wrote:

“My younger sister's funeral cost over 800k.”

Nony wrote:

“Dignified does not equal expensive for me. I’d rather people spend for me whilst I am still alive.”

Pretty Owami wrote:

“I believe in a budget funeral, R30,000. I think it’s enough.”

Malidlamini wrote:

“We live in a time when we plan for funerals, and a funeral is a final celebration of one’s life. Mina ngoswela bona abantu who will spend my money wisely. R200,000 is my budget. Nice presidential casket, fresh flowers and the rest towards food. People must eat and enjoy my final goodbye. If you can’t afford it or haven’t saved for such, it’s fine, feed people semishi lika Jam and Oros, your money, your rules.”

Mother of many wrote:

“I attended a funeral in Free State and was surprised how simple it was, just chairs, one table for abafundisi, no decor. Those who went to the graveyard paid for transport. I think they spent around 30k because of a cow and a goat. Sometimes we overspend unnecessarily, but it’s all about affordability.”

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Mbali Jassi wrote:

“I spent R87k on my father’s funeral, including the tombstone, in 2018. Thank God he had money saved for us to bury him, but it was too much, honestly.”

White Pearl wrote:

“Nothing over 50K. Sandwiches, scones and juice or tea to be served, then the rest of the money goes to my kids. Yes, I’m dead kodwa ngizele, they must live off those monies.”

Alchemist wrote:

“We share the same sentiments that a funeral is for the living. Dignified, yes, but as black folk we do too much man.”

Check out the TikTok video below:

3 Other Briefly News stories related to funerals

• The funeral service of rapper and dancer Dugulth Ferreira, known as Junior King, was announced on Wednesday, 17 December 2025.
• A group of friends were filmed dancing and grooving around their late friend Tumaras during his final send-off, stunning many viewers.
• A TikTok video captured a moment at a funeral that amassed a lot of traction on the short-form video platform.

Source: Briefly News