South African Man Opens Up About Trauma of Being Raped and Living With HIV

• A man named Lindelani shared his coming out story in an exclusive sit-down interview with Briefly News via Briefly TV Life
• In the interview, Lindani opened up about exploring his sexuality, experiencing a gay club, being raped and living with HIV
• Lindani shared the brutality of living in his truth and how he was violated, betrayed and homeless as he tried to figure out the direction of his life

After being a father for four years, Lindelani began to explore his sexuality.

He decided to visit a gay club, which would go on to wreck his life.

Exploring his sexuality

At only 21 years old, Lindelani started exploring his sexuality as he was not sure whether he was gay or straight.

Read also

Mother disciplines her son after he loses his good quality Woolworths school shoes

Lindani grew up with his baby mama and fell in love with her while playing "house" during childhood:

“We grew up with the idea that I am the father and she’s the mother, so we started dating and having feelings for each other. We started having sexual intercourse; that’s when we made a baby.”

Lindani told Briefly News that he knew that he was gay, but a part of him still questioned it. He started dreaming of himself sleeping with men and began developing real-life feelings for men:

“I was questioning my sexuality, but I thought it’s just a demon and I’ll get over it.”

Lindani started dating a man right after his baby mama announced their pregnancy:

“I did not come out to my family or siblings but I was dating this guy on Facebook so he picmixed our pictures and tagged me.”

Read also

Kenyan lady visits lover only to find another woman in his house: "My heart sunk"

Watch the interview below:

Coming out of the closet

The sudden announcement of his relationship with a man on Facebook came as a shock to his loved ones, but his baby mama did not believe the news until she saw Lindelani with a man, who he later introduced to her.

“When my baby was four years, I started being out there but I was still in the closet. I was still dating that guy who was my first boyfriend who started introducing me to gay clubs.”

Lindelani and his boyfriend had a fight in the club and his partner abandoned him on the spot without a phone. Lindelani sought help from two guys who plotted a trap to rape him.

The guys made up an excuse to lure Lindelani to their home, where they coerced him to sleep with them. They were armed which eliminated Lindelani’s option of running away:

Read also

Married man hurt over side chick's wedding plans says he is ready to raise their son

“When I get inside, the other guy is naked with a gun in his hand and asked to have fun.”

Lindelani was too afraid to open a case because he feared judgement from his loved ones, but when he fell sick, he knew that he needed to go in for a check-up. Tthat’s when his shocking HIV status was revealed to him.

“I fell into depression for some time because that’s when I started feeling crazy because I was eating from garbage bins and decided to take my journey with ARVs seriously.”

The traumatic experience drove Lindelani to drug addiction. He finally opened up to his family about his HIV status, but was too embarrassed to tell them about the rape.

Finding the right moment to step out of the closet

A gay man, Phury Mgange, also shared his story about coming out of the closet with Briefly News and highlighted that openness had helped him build stronger relationships:

Read also

Big brother fills in for mom in adorable singing and dancing video with little sister, SA is in awe

“For me, realising I was gay involved a lot of introspection and experiences over time. I didn't have a single defining moment; rather, it was a series of feelings and attractions that became clear to me as I grew older.

“Some people explore different relationships and scenarios before they understand their sexual orientation, while others may know early on without needing such exploration. That was in my case.

“Coming out of the closet was a significant and personal step. It involved first accepting myself and then finding the right moments to share this part of my identity with friends and family. It wasn't always easy, but honesty and openness have helped me build stronger, more authentic relationships.

“Everyone's journey is different, and there's no right or wrong way to navigate it.”

A gay man's blues

Briefly News reported on the story of Collins, who came to South Africa in search of greener pastures and had to live a gay lifestyle to make it in the foreign land. He later went to Saudi Arabia, where he continued with his gay lifestyle and would pocket between R248 to R497 per client.

Read also

Ex-cop tangled up in possession charge shares story of arrest: "Dealing with the cartels"

The Nairobi man said poverty and greed, to some extent, pushed him to become gay as he wanted to transform his life.

Source: Briefly News