100 hilarious short people jokes: Pocket-sized punchlines that pack a big laugh

100 hilarious short people jokes: Pocket-sized punchlines that pack a big laugh

The world would be a truly boring place without laughter. People make jokes to sharpen their sensibilities and tune their capabilities. Besides, humour improves an individual's personality by bringing out their lighter side. Short people often face ridicule for their height. If you have a short buddy, use short people jokes on them today.

A happy woman in a black top is leaning on a window sill
A happy woman in a black top is leaning on a window sill. Photo: pexels.com, @RDNE Stock project (modified by author)
Source: UGC

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Short people jokes are not made for ridicule. Instead, they are used to create fun and make people laugh. If you are short, you can make life easier by accepting your height and laughing about it.

Hilarious short people jokes to use

Are you short, or do you have short buddies or family members? Tell them short people jokes to make them laugh about their height. Below is a compilation of hilarious ones to try.

Short jokes about short people

Are you looking for hilarious short jokes for short people? Check out the collection below.

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  • I hope the next stage of your life comes with a ladder.
  • One day, short people will rule the world. All five feet of it, of course.
  • Coming down the stairs must feel like skydiving for you.
  • You are so short you could sweep under your bed while standing.
  • Behind every short woman is a house decoration that was being hidden.
  • You are so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.
  • You look like you still have a lot of growing up to do.
  • Must be tough needing a step stool to kiss your wife goodbye everyday.
  • Short people are oppressed. They’re always getting overlooked.
  • You should go and fight with someone your own size. Like a toothpick.
  • Hey, snow white called and asked when you were coming home.
  • I can see you’ve chosen not to grow over the past few years.
  • Jump up ten times each morning; it will help you elongate yourself.
  • You are so short you could be drowned by heavy rains.
  • You are so short you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
  • Let us go. I will give you a ride. Hop into my pocket.
  • The water in the shower evaporates before it reaches you.

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Must-see jokes to make fun of short people

A small black horse is running on a field with flowers
A small black horse is running on a field with flowers. Photo: pexels.com, @Jan Laugesen (modified by author)
Source: UGC

You have probably seen funny short people memes and even saved some on your phone. You can also create new ones to add to your collection using these must-see jokes.

  • Everyone knows that it is easier to bury short people. All you need to do is find the right shoe box.
  • You can crawl into tight spaces like all those little rodents. You should consider it your superpower.
  • Why was the short lady scared of the iguana? She thought it was Godzilla.
  • Wearing heels almost makes you the same size as other people on the face of the earth.
  • When a short person waves at you, what do you call it? A microwave.
  • Be careful! The little guy might jump up and punch you in the knee.
  • You are so short; if you pull up your pants, you’d be blind.
  • What kind of horse does a short person ride? A miniature horse.
  • What is a short person’s favourite dessert? Strawberry shortcake.
  • You are so short you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.
  • You are so short that Michaelangelo could make a life-size sculpture of you with one can of play-dough.
  • Your momma is so short - her passports look like full-fledged pictures.
  • Someone said it sounds like plates breaking when two midgets have sex.
  • The only difference between short people and gnomes is their ability to speak.
  • If short people formed their own country, what would their national anthem be? ‘It’s a small world after all’.
  • Why aren’t short people allowed to be mentors? Because you can’t look up to them.
  • What is a short person’s favourite side order? A small fry.

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Funny short people jokes

A side profile of a young man laughing
A side profile of a young man laughing. Photo: pexels.com, @PNW Production (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Sometimes, jokes about short people are considered insulting. For this reason, mean jokes about short people should be used with caution. People with a good sense of humour will laugh these jokes away.

  • You are so short I bet you do not have to bend to tie your shoelaces.
  • Why do short people have a hard time raising a family? Because they struggle to put food on the table.
  • I asked a short person to lend me five dollars yesterday. He said, “Sorry, I am a little short.”
  • What does a short pirate do with a toothpick? They use it as a peg leg.
  • You know you are short if you think the people on the wedding cake are the actual bride and groom.
  • Midgets are always the last to find out when the rains start.
  • What position does a short person play on a basketball team? The ball.
  • Why can’t short people become chefs? Because it’s a high steaks job.
  • You are so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool because they were scared you’ll drown in the kiddie pool.
  • How do short people greet others? They microwave.
  • How come an elf can’t lend you money? Because they’re always a little short.
  • Why do short people always have food in their teeth? Because they cannot pick up a toothpick.
  • Where is the worst place for a short person to stand at a concert? Behind anyone at all.
  • What do short people call an iPad? A desktop computer.
  • Do you know what always catches my eye? Short people with umbrellas.
  • How does a short person take a bath? They get into the sink!
  • What do short people call burritos? Sleeping bags.

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Clever short people jokes

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A yellow tri-spinner fidget toy on a blue tabletop. Photo: pexels.com, @Stas Knop (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Like other forms of humour, wit is just fun to read or tell. Below is a collection of clever or witty jokes about short people.

  • I heard short people can hear what the ancestors are saying since they are so close to the ground. You are the literal definition of down-to-earth.
  • What is so offensive about short people jokes? I consider them the height of comedy.
  • Why did the short guy fall asleep in his harness and his helmet? Because he was tired from climbing into bed.
  • Why can’t short people get depressed? They’re always looking up!
  • Why do you need to explain jokes to short people? To make sure it doesn’t go over their head.
  • What do you call short people on a merry-go-round? A midget spinner.
  • What do short people call something that’s too high up? Absolute zero because it’s impossible to reach.
  • Sometimes I want to make a joke about short people, but I don’t want to stoop to their level.
  • Never fight short people. They hit below the belt.
  • How does a short person reach the top shelf? They don’t.
  • Have you ever noticed that short people have more role models than anyone else? It’s because they look up to everyone.
  • At least one advantage of being short is you get to be in front of all pictures taken every time.
  • Attack on Titan is actually a slice of life for short people.
  • You know you’re short when people ask you which Minion character you played in the movie.
  • Why can you lie in front of short people without consequences? It goes over their heads.
  • Short people are oppressed. They are always getting overlooked.
  • You know you are short if you can play handball on the curb.

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Cute jokes to say to short people

A close-up shot of a person playing golf
A close-up shot of a person playing golf. Photo: pexels.com, @Volker Thimm (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Being short has many disadvantages, but there are certain things that are undeniably better. You can make cute jokes using the advantages and demerits.

  • Short people like you can use Legos for steps and not break a sweat.
  • God only lets things grow until they are perfect. Some of us didn’t take as long as others!
  • What is a short person’s favourite thing on the menu? Short ribs.
  • Cooking turns into a workout because you have to climb the counters.
  • Do you know your head would make the absolute best armrest?
  • Do you know what short people call miniature golf? Golf.
  • Short people tend to get mad easily because they are so close to the ground. Their anger does not dissipate easily.
  • What three things does a short person need to take a bath? Floaties, a snorkel, and a lifeguard.
  • When short people smoke, they do not get high. They get medium.
  • How do short people shoot a bow and arrow? With a rubber band and a toothpick.
  • You should not make fun of short people. They belittle themselves.
  • Why did the short guy drop out of college? Because he couldn’t reach higher education.
  • Sometimes when I look at short people I wonder… If they’re able to reach their goals.
  • Short people are always sad because they cannot reach happiness.
  • What do you call a door for short people? A doggy door.
  • You are so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice/dreams.

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Hilarious short people jokes

A close-up picture of a dachshund on a pavement
A close-up picture of a dachshund on a pavement. Photo: pexels.com, @Nicolas Cappella (modified by author)
Source: UGC

There are many short-people-problem jokes to leave people in stitches, and below are some. Remember that dark jokes about short people can easily cause bad blood between friends, family, colleagues, or acquaintances.

  • I crashed into the back of a vehicle at the lights today. A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.” I said, “Which one are you, shortie?”
  • You hardly see a short person being fat at the same time. They have to do a lot of exercise going up and down the kitchen.
  • Have you heard about those self-driving cars? Turns out it was just a bunch of short people driving around.
  • Tall people and short people should never date. Long-distance relationships never work out.
  • Do you know what a little get-together is? A short people party. Must be so hard being overlooked all the time.
  • In some nations, it is taboo for a short person to drive because they can’t see where they’re going.
  • I was shocked to read in the papers today that a short person had been pickpocketed. I just thought to myself, “How could someone stoop so low?”
  • Why was the short person stuck in the elevator? Because they couldn’t reach the ‘door open’ button.
  • Why was the short guy scared of the wiener dog? Because it was too tall.
  • Why shouldn’t you hire short people as chefs? Because the steaks are too high.
  • You're so short; if you pull up your pants, you'd be blind.
  • How do you win an argument with a short person? You stoop to their level.
  • What is the name of a short Mexican? A paragraph because he's not a full essay yet.
  • What do you name a gathering of short Irishmen suffering from leprosy? Lepercon.
  • I met a couple of really short people today. They were really down-to-earth guys.
  • What did the short person say to the tall person? "Excuse me, can you help me reach the top shelf of cuteness?"

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How do you tell someone they are short in a nice way?

You can tell someone they are vertically challenged. Always weigh your words before using them to ensure you do not hurt the person.

What are the benefits of being short?

Short people are generally more comfortable, clothes are easier to find, they blend easily with the crowd, and they can easily fit into small places.

What was Randy Newman's biggest hit?

Short People (1977), I Love L.A. (1983), and You've Got a Friend in Me (1995) with Lyle Lovett were some of Randy Newman's biggest hits.

This collection of short people jokes is hilarious. Always be sensitive when making fun of your short friends and family, as you do not want to hurt their feelings.

Briefly.co.za recently published a list of the funniest Mexican jokes that will make you burst into tears. Immediate thoughts of Mexico are nachos, tacos, and the Spanish language rather than humour.

Mexican culture is deeply rooted in laughter and familial bonds, where spending time together involves sharing laughter and jokes. This is partly why Mexican jokes have become part of what most entertainment lovers want to read.

Source: Briefly News

Authors:
Bennett Yates avatar

Bennett Yates (Lifestyle writer) Bennett Yates is a content creator with over five years of working experience in journalism and copywriting. He graduated from the University of Nairobi (2017) with a Bachelor's in Information Technology. In 2023, Bennett finished the AFP course on Digital Investigation Techniques. He started working for Briefly in 2019. You can reach him via email at bennetyates@gmail.com.

Cyprine Apindi avatar

Cyprine Apindi (Lifestyle writer) Cyprine Apindi is a content creator and educator with over six years of experience. She holds a Diploma in Mass Communication and a Bachelor’s degree in Nutrition and Dietetics from Kenyatta University. Cyprine joined Briefly.co.za in mid-2021, covering multiple topics, including finance, entertainment, sports, and lifestyle. In 2023, she finished the AFP course on Digital Investigation Techniques. She received the 2023 Writer of the Year Award. In 2024, she completed the Google News Initiative course. Email: cyprineapindi@gmail.com

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