Cape Town Resident Asks Why It's So Hard to Make Real Friends Despite Endless Events
- A Cape Town resident with 10 years in the city sparked a debate on Reddit about why making genuine friends there feels so difficult
- The post pointed to the city's busy social calendar of hikes, markets and salsa nights, yet questioned why real connections remain elusive
- Fellow Capetonians flooded the comments with mixed responses, from practical advice to blunt home truths
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Source: Getty Images
A Cape Town local sparked a lively online debate after posting on the r/capetown subreddit about the surprising difficulty of forming real friendships in a city that never seems short of social opportunities.
The Reddit user, posting under the handle JustACityBoy_CT, said that despite living in Cape Town for a decade, he still found the city "weirdly cliquey." He pointed to the abundance of hiking groups, beach days, markets, salsa nights and coffee spots, yet said finding people who genuinely want to show up at the same time still felt harder than it should.
Cape Town's friendship problem
The post resonated with many, quickly drawing dozens of comments from residents who either shared the frustration or had strong opinions about why it happens. Some offered practical solutions. User AdditionalLaw5853 suggested joining structured group activities such as community theatre, noting it had helped them build close friendships. They also pointed to organisations like Lions, Round Table and Rotary as worthwhile options for meeting people.
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Others were more candid. User _prettyprincess did not hold back, asking whether the original poster had considered that the problem might lie closer to home. User The_Firestones3273 took a more generous view, saying the city was not cliquey at all in their experience. They argued that the trick was to genuinely enjoy yourself, and that people would naturally gravitate towards you. Check out the Reddit post here
"10 years is a long time to go without building your own circle."
Source: Getty Images
Capetonians react online
Not everyone was sympathetic to the original question. Several users pointed out that the same topic comes up on the subreddit repeatedly. User pupperinpredicament called the posts ‘so annoying,’ while dugulen suggested the moderators create a dedicated megathread for friend-finding discussions.
LeaguePublic added:
"Join clubs (hiking, running, etc), a choir or orchestra, etc etc. I found it easy to make friends originating from a different part of the country."
NotGoodSoftwareMaker said:
"If you come to Big Bay, I'll go surfing with you bud."
Pupperinpredicament wrote:
"These posts are so annoying. How many times is the same thing going to get posted on this sub?"
Prettyprincess said:
"Have you ever considered that maybe you're the problem? 10 years is a long time to go without building your own circle."
The_Firestones3273 shared:
"The trick is to just genuinely enjoy yourself, and people will gravitate towards you. Love life, do what excites you and Bob's ya Uncle!"
Adventurous-Role-417 added:
"You need to find a friend, and then you both need to find a new friend; that's the only real way it will work."
u/sadgirlmae wrote:
"I'm 20, and I'm also still trying to figure it out. It's so lonely tbh."
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Source: Briefly News
